you guys and your wierd half-human half-animal whatever, but me?

Description: Ez (the little joke self-insert guy) Height: 2'5" Weight: 5 Pounds Health: 250 Defense: 0 Abilities: Transmutation (Ez can change his shape whenever he wants, however he wants.) Slime Invincibility (All Physical moves will go through him. Literally.) Absorb (Ez can absorb any and all liquid, and it will strengthen him depending on what he absorbs.) Natural Stickiness (Ez can stick to whatever he touches) Weaknesses: Water. Moves/Attacks: Banana Gun: a banana with the ability to shoot bullets. (35 damage per bullet) Melon Bomb: a watermelon with the supernatural ability to literally explode (100 damage) Carrot Knife: a simple sharpened carrot. (20 Damage) Beam (ULTIMATE MOVE): you just got beamed you fuckin loser (instant death to you)