rp gallery

9d73bf Its a drawing of bubble pop electric

d6b1d3 John then releases his power from his years of training, and KILLS the evil Jimmy who planned to let him rot in the workshop

9d73bf I see. I tried digital drawing fir the first time again in a few months. Wanna see?

65a21e

d6b1d3 I'm just existing tbh

9d73bf Uhhhh not sure. Weird mix of everything. What about you twinny how are youu

d6b1d3 how are you pee jake

9d73bf Yes yes hello hi greetings salutations Ohio go saimas shoe

d6b1d3 What if John was BETRAYED and trapped in the hyperbolic workshop for 100 years

65a21e NO FUCK its the hyperbolic time chamber

65a21e 100 years in the time dilation chamber

d6b1d3 holy crap PJ appearance after 100 years

9d73bf I love TOOL,,.,.also fuck mobile pam

65a21e hi papper rapper

9d73bf WELL I GOT SOME ADVICE FOR YOU LITTLE BUDDYYY BEFORE YOU POINT THE FINGER YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT IM THE MAANNN IM THE MAN AND HES THE MAN AND YOURE THE MAN AS WELLLL

d6b1d3 hi jork pork

d6b1d3 Like this, like that, like this this, like that. Like this, like that, like this this, like that

65a21e i WAS gonna go to sleep, but i uh, changed my mind. whats up chat

d6b1d3 goons

224a35 rughghghgh

823b65 im gonna head to bed gn

823b65 alright

f421bf oh, in regards to mental wellbeing, that was just an umbrella term for how i treated myself to feel happy in my younger self. so, shedding that away for different things now makes sense

f421bf its blunted, the old feelings and allat, but its not going to be something I want to bother me, especially if I am actively changing.

f421bf I accept that I am not myself anymore, because I'm not. The ego that once was there has dissipated into a new one and alongside it are uncertainty for the future. Letting that old self die, because it was a younger, impulsive, yet still sharp. it didn't know that things would turn out this way, or how the sadness always came about in ways that made it act irrational, a way to kill itself in a way that could be considered the ultimate addendum of what it was. Instead, it must simply grow out and away, and a new spark is there to be lit.

823b65 im not quiet sure i understand since it seems like you're saying mental wellbeing is something you'll leave behind but i agree that shedding is key to growth

f421bf i'll be a more free person now, not worrying about always acting to be a pleaser, as otherwise, i'll never let things go. pleasing, connections, mental wellbeing, those were aspects that made me feel like i was doing things the right way, not necessarily correct. But, i'll lay it to rest. It still leaves bitter feelings. but accepting it makes it a good transition into the new self.

823b65 thats good that you're working towards undoing that mindset

f421bf i suppose i still get caught up in those thoughts today. ive been building myself back up with better positive affirmations, with someone alongside me that i trust. but, past mistakes will always be that thing that remains by my side as something to be weary of. ive done alot of reactive type of thinking, or acting in a reactionary way to be a pleaser, since that was what i learned and was taught. basically, cause no issues to those around you, no matter how you may feel.

823b65 Ridi Pagliaccio, sul tuo amore infranto

823b65 but understanding why doesnt immediately fix emotional weight, so i did want to say that i do understand where you're coming from, and its an incredibly difficult thing to deal with. All in all its basically an identity crisis, being haunted by the old self and old enviornment, and contrasting it with your present self and enviornment. Its a heavy, tolling struggle, so constantly remind yourself that it isn't something to be hefted alone.

823b65 it fades slowly, things that youre angry about just dont give that same anger whenever they come to mind anymore, things that made your heart race out of anxiety seem like less trouble, and it makes you wonder if youre becoming desensitized from thinking about them over and over again, but its just your mind learning to move on, its what we call "maturing" but in reality its a much more deep and complex mental system, that relies on a lot more than just aging. A good way to facilitate "good" thought is to sit down and let your mind flow, soon enough you'll come across those negative memories and thoughts, and as you ponder and look over them, you'll notice that another voice comes up that challenges them, says something like "ok well it wasn't THAT bad, this happened, and then this happened". These sorts of internal conversations can and do lead to deeper appreciations of things that might have initially slipped your mind, its one stepping stone towards progress.

f421bf i see people try so hard to make memories last and i always felt confused as ever since i was young, there was no more good memories. the mindset became that life pleasures should be felt first, the memory comes from the experience. but, the times where you dont have much else to look back on, it will always be a blur.

f421bf ive honestly have had enough of never having good memories to look back on. looking forward is the one thing i'll end up doing as the year goes by. painful moments are always playing in loop across my head like mental scars, and i think moving on from the guilt is going to be whats best.

823b65 human biology makes it insanely difficult for us to even think about good things, we're wired to consider the bad far above the good, since it means a better chance of survival. remembering what made you feel bad allows for you to avoid it at all costs and live a better life, remembering what made you feel good comes second to that. It means we unfortunately forget about alot of the good, and keep all of the bad very close to us. It's also why parents and other figures find it so difficult to congradulate and you see them scrutinizing much more often. But, the first step to change is understanding, so once someone understands that flaw within their thinking, they can be more mindful of it moving forward, literally thinking to themselves "am i thinking too much about the bad and not enough about the good?" when something bad happens, or when something good happens, and they slowly grow.

f421bf it just never seems like i could pinpoint a "good" memory so to say

f421bf do the past memories of good things are more common than of other things?

ed0a54 ❤️

006d2b bloing

823b65 the absolution that we all require yet most never approach is that of the self unto the self

823b65 the past defines us, reflection and completion results in a fuller, absolute life